5 As you do not know the path of the wind,
or how the body is formed [a] in a mother's womb,
so you cannot understand the work of God,
the Maker of all things.
6 Sow your seed in the morning,
and at evening let not your hands be idle,
for you do not know which will succeed,
whether this or that,
or whether both will do equally well.
I found these verses in Ecclesiastes 11 last night and felt they were appropriate. Being in limbo with things (adoption and buying the house) I feel like I should be able to control, but it is obvious I have no control of, at least I know that God knows what is going on and is orchestrating it. Rather than waste my time throwing pity parties I should be keeping busy with what God has given me. Just like these verses say... I do my part, and stay busy while waiting for God to bring the results.
I had my important phone call from the adoption agency that was due at 3pm. I kept telling the girls all day. DO NOT talk to me or come into the room during this phone call. Then right at 3, I happened to look at the phone I was carrying around and it said "line in use" We have 3 phones and I quickly found one other, but one was missing and apparently was off the hook. Since I have been on the verge of tears this week anyway, the missing one was about to send me over the edge. I finally found it in the couch and sure enough it was turned on. While I discovered that, the agency called me on my cell phone. I was able to call him back on the landline and we had a good talk. It is very sad to probably have to change countries again, and in no way do I blame the agency. I don't want our struggles to discourage anyone from adopting. As I told our agency worker, I know God called us to adopt, we thought our child as in Guatemala, but apparently we were wrong, so we thought she was in Vietnam, and we are probably going to be wrong again. But I know God has a plan, and He knows what "distractions" we needed to get us to the right country at the exact time when that child He picked our family for is timed to be matched with us. And I know that when that happens, and we bring her home, that we will be so thankful God led us down this sad, frustrating path. It is hard to keep the big picture in mind and not get angry. I will not give up! People may see our "bad luck" of paying money into not one, but two countries that happened to close right after we get on waiting lists, and say "why don't you give up?" "maybe it's not meant to be", or what I heard yesterday "at what point do you think God may be telling you no?"
Think of any Bible examples. Since when did God tell someone to do something and it all go so smoothly without any effort or perserverance of the person obeying?
By the way, we will pretty much be starting from scratch with the money thing when we change countries. It will not transfer. Also, he said that he will be travelling to a few countries next month in hopes that they can start adoption programs there. I asked if they would be ready by September, and he said hopefully they might be able to take applications by that point. I hope that they are countries that we qualify for and that will give us more options as to where to go next. They are still encouraging everyone to stay in the program until September 1 when the final decision will be made as to whether the program will close and as to whether they will be grandfathering everyone in.